From «impostor syndrome» to self-worth: advice from a psychologist to advocates
Advocates often work at the limits of their capabilities, but do not always feel satisfied with what they have achieved. Information overload, constant comparison with others on social media, and «impostor syndrome» devalue even obvious achievements.
How can you learn to notice your own progress and develop a healthy attitude toward success? Psychologist and gestalt therapist Yulia Kudelia provided answers to these questions. During a webinar hosted by the Ukrainian National Bar Association (UNBA) and supported by the International Bar Association, she presented scientific approaches and practical techniques for self-support.
According to the WHO, 85% of people worldwide have low self-esteem, and 62% of professionals regularly experience «impostor syndrome». According to the speaker, even successful professionals often live with the feeling that they are «out of place» and fear that those around them will expose their alleged incompetence. Added to this is the constant flow of information and social networks that fuel comparisons with others. As a result, people do not have time to reflect on their day and lose the ability to notice their own steps forward.
The problem is compounded by the blurred boundaries between work and personal life. Remote work and constant «productivity» even during leisure time mean that the brain does not have space for post-contact — a state when the experience of the day is assimilated and we can experience feelings of satisfaction or pride. It is in post-contact that we have a chance to truly feel our own successes.
Therefore, Y. Kudelia emphasized, it is important to distinguish between the concepts of «self-esteem» and «self-worth». The former is based on comparison with others and constant competition. The latter is based on an internal sense of one's own value without reference to external standards. It is the development of self-worth that is associated with a sense of security, the ability to cooperate, and the maintenance of inner stability.
The psychologist explained this difference through the concept of the three brain systems proposed by psychologist Paul Gilbert: the threat system, the drive system, and the comfort system. When we evaluate ourselves solely through the prism of success or failure, the threat system is activated, bringing anxiety, shame, and self-criticism. On the other hand, in a state of calm and self-care, a sense of self-worth emerges, allowing us to see our development without constant pressure.
In the second part of the webinar, the expert gave practical advice on how to learn to notice your own successes:
- Record small victories. At the end of the day, write down 2-3 things that went well. It could be a completed work stage, a timely break, or just a warm conversation.
- Praise yourself for your efforts, not just the result. As Carol Dweck's experiments on «growth mindset» have shown, praise for effort motivates more than praise for talent. The same works in internal dialogue.
- Shift your focus from «must» to «can». Mistakes are experiences, not failures. This approach allows you to maintain your drive and avoid falling into stress.
- Practice gratitude. Write down what you are grateful for to yourself, other people, or circumstances. Studies show that even two weeks of practicing gratitude reduces burnout and improves sleep.
- Create a «self-care framework». This is a set of simple rituals and rules: regular sleep, nutrition, balance between work and rest, maintaining relationships. Such a «framework» can be compared to a mother's care for her child.
The speaker also mentioned the metaphor of «green pasture». If mistakes in school were usually marked with a red pen, then green is a way to record successes. Y. Kudelia called for introducing this habit into your diary or internal dialogue: for every self-criticism, find a reason for praise.
In conclusion, the psychologist emphasized that success is not only the result achieved, but also the daily practice of caring for oneself. It is this practice that provides inner stability in times of uncertainty and allows advocates to combine professional development with psychological well-being.
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